


One Shot

by th3blackcat



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: I cried during the stream, Lance has such a soft spot in my heart so this hurt me to write, M/M, So yeah, because of an art stream, but I was determined to do so because Mogi said I couldn't do it, here it is, i teared up writing this, so this happened
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-01
Updated: 2017-02-01
Packaged: 2018-09-21 10:01:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9542711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/th3blackcat/pseuds/th3blackcat
Summary: Lance was tired. He just wanted to go home.





	

**Author's Note:**

> ~~The title is a pun~~

Blue was the last lion to pull into her hanger. Lance quickly headed out of the cockpit and ran out of the hanger to meet up with everyone else. His run turned into a slow jog before coming to a complete stop. The smile on his face quickly faded. He watched as Shiro, Hunk, and Pidge showered Keith in praise and hugs. Sure, Keith did a good job today, but Lance didn’t mess up. He didn’t make a mistake. In fact, he covered everyone flawlessly today.

But was that all he was good for? Covering everyone?

Lance turned away from the group where Allura and Coran joined in as well and headed to change before walking to his room. No one noticed as he walked away. No one called for him or ran after him.

The seventh wheel was a cold and lonely place. He didn’t know why he was here. Why Blue chose him. He was replaceable, unnecessary…useless…

Lance walked over to a remote observation deck on the ship, far from everyone else. He sat down in front of the large glass panel and stared at the stars as he pulled his hood up.

He was tired. Tired of pretending to be happy. Tired of pretending that he was okay with the bare minimum he received. Tired of feeling dispensable. At least when he was in the Garrison, he had some sort of role. He was a fighter pilot – even if he just got the spot because Keith was kicked out – but it was still something important.

Was it such a bad thing to want some validation? Always being compared to Keith, always being told he wasn’t good enough. He was right behind Keith in his scores so that must mean he’s good at something.

Right?

...right…?

Lance didn’t know how long he had sat there, alone, letting his thoughts run him into the ground over and over again. His chest ached, his arms and legs felt heavy, and his mind was numb. He saw Keith’s reflection in the glass. He watched silently as Keith hesitated to enter the observation deck. Once Keith got closer, Lance was able to make out his expression. Worry, sadness, concern, all of the above, Lance couldn’t tell.

Keith stood next to him and opted to look outside at the stars as well. They stayed like that for a few moments, neither of them breaking the silence, neither of them knowing exactly what to say.

“I saw you walk off after we got back and thought you would come back after some time alone, but you never showed up to dinner. Everything okay?” Keith asked, finally breaking the silence.

Lance could tell he was being genuine from his voice, but he didn’t want Keith to be genuinely worried about him. He didn’t need Keith of all people to pity him. Lance closed his eyes for a moment and let out a short breath.

“Oh man, seriously? I didn’t know that much time had passed. Watching the stars makes me lose track of everything going on.” He looked up at Keith with his usual smile.

Keith watched as Lance’s hood fell off. He didn’t buy that. “You look –“

“Beautiful? Gorgeous? Too hot to be single? I know.” He ran a hand through his hair before getting up.

“ – broken.”

Lance’s smile faltered. “Nah, just a little tired.”

Keith looked at Lance unsure. Lance had worked hard today so it was plausible, but at the same time, he knew what Lance was like when he was tired. This was not it. Keith never felt close enough to Lance to talk about feelings, but if something was troubling him, Keith wanted to be able to help.

“You did work really hard today. You did a really good job.” Keith searched Lance’s face for any clue as to what was wrong.

Lance widened his fake smile. “Thanks, I appreciate it.”

It wasn’t a lie. Lance appreciated Keith looking for him and telling him that. It just…wasn’t enough at this point.

“Lance, what’s wrong?” Keith place a hand on Lance shoulder and felt his muscles tense up under his touch.

“Nothing, why?”

“You’re not being you.”

Lance’s smile grew smaller and he looked outside. “I suppose. I’ll do better tomorrow.”

“What?” he asked confused.

Lance took a minute to sort through his thoughts. “I’ll do a better job fulfilling my role tomorrow. Don’t worry. The jokester will be back. He’s just tired.”

“Lance…you can’t think that’s what I mean…”

“But isn’t it?” Lance asked with a defeated expression. “That’s what I’m good at – lightening the mood, making myself look like an idiot. But don’t worry, I just need some rest.”

“Lance –“

“Don’t.” His voice was quiet, yet Keith could hear the all the motion behind it. If Keith had to choose one word to describe it, he would say Lance sounded agitated. “Don’t tell me that’s not true because everyone on this ship knows it is. And I especially don’t need to hear anything from the star child – the golden boy – about it. Let’s face it, I’m not needed here for anything other than a comedic relief so please, don’t tell me otherwise.”

Keith shook his head and turned Lance to face him. “I’m not going to lie to you. You’re my teammate, my friend, and I will never let you think that way. You are not comedic relief. Hell, you’re far from it. You saved my ass so many times, not just today, but all the time. I always notice it, and I may not thank you every time, but you bet I always appreciate having you around.”

“Yeah, but I get us into the most trouble. I’m just bringing everyone down…I’m not meant for this…”

Keith could hear the grief in his voice. The tears that Lance couldn’t summon earlier were threatening to fall as he tried to choke them back. It caused his throat to close and he his breaths came out shaky and uneven.

Keith’s hands fell from his shoulders and he watched as Lance slowly crumbled in front of him. He would never have guessed Lance was hurting this much – that he was lacking this much confidence in himself. It hurt Keith to watch as Lance fell to his knees, trying to control his sobs. Keith kneeled in front of him and carefully pulled him into a hug. At this point, Lance had cracked. His façade broke and one wrong move would cause him to shatter.

“Lance,” Keith said quietly into his ear. “You can’t say things like you aren’t meant for this. If you weren’t, the blue lion would have never chosen you. I had gone into that cave so many times to try to figure out what those carvings meant, but she didn’t react until _you_ were with me. She waited all this time for you. Ten thousand years to be exact. So you can’t tell me that you’re just the jokester.” Keith pulled back and lifted Lance’s chin so he was looking into Keith’s eyes. “You were _meant_ to be.”

Lance looked down and pushed Keith away. “This isn’t something I’ve been feeling since we found Blue. I’ve been feeling this way since we were at the Garrison.”

“We?”

“Yes, we.” Years of bottled up emotions, thoughts, feelings, were all pouring out of Lance and it was too late to make it stop. “I always wanted nothing more than to be a pilot and go out into space. I went to the Garrison in hopes that I could make my parents proud so they could go around and tell everyone ‘Hey, my kid is a genius too’.” He remembered the look on their face when he told them he got in. They looked at Lance with so much pride and love…he felt like he would never see it again.

Lance sucked in a deep breath before continuing. “So when I get there and am told that I’m a cargo pilot, it hurt, but I still wasn’t going to give up. Then I finally figure out who beat me out of the fighter pilot position and I strive to be that good. I wanted to beat you so bad, so you could imagine how I felt when I was told that I got bumped to fighter class. I was thrilled. And then I was told it was because you got kicked out and yeah, it hurt to know that I only got fighter class because you weren’t there anymore, but I was still doing what I originally planned.

“That happiness was soon gone because even though you were gone, you were still there. Everyone always compared me to you, reminding me that I was only there because you weren’t. I never felt so ashamed and now…it’s the Garrison all over again. Everyone giving you jobs to do because Lance will just fuck it up. Everyone praising you when you do something great and I get yelled at for my mistakes. I’m still living in your shadow. No matter what I do, I will never be as good as you.” Lance looked up at Keith who couldn’t look at him anymore. He didn’t know if Keith knew about any of this. He didn’t care if this made Keith feel bad or hurt him because Lance _needed_ to get it out.

“Honestly, Keith, I can’t do this anymore.” Lance’s voice began to rise, not out of anger, but out of frustration. “I’m tired. My body just can’t keep up with me anymore. I want to go back home. I want to go back to the Garrison where I can be me, where I can focus on getting better without you looking over my shoulder. I want to be with my parents who always loved me as I was. They always told me how proud they were of me and now…they don’t even know if I’m alive. I literally have nothing here.”

Keith was looking down in his lap. “You have Hunk and Shiro. Pidge, Allura, Coran. Me,” he replied quietly. “You have all of us. Sure, at the beginning you were a little rocky, but you’ve grown so much. I’m sorry if you always felt that way and I never wanted to hurt you. Honestly, I saw you at the Garrison and I don’t know…I wanted to be your friend. But you started that rivalry thing and I didn’t know what to do. When I saw you that day Shiro crashed, I wanted to play it off as if I didn’t know you to try to start over, but it was clear you wouldn’t let that happen.” Keith hesitated. After everything Lance told him, he wouldn’t be surprised if he never wanted to speak to Keith again, but he decided to risk it.

“So I’m going to ask you now, can we start over? From the beginning?”

Lance blinked. What did he just say? He stared at Keith, trying to process everything and think it through. “What are you trying to get at?”

“Nothing. Something. I don’t know…”

Lance waited for his answer.

Keith sighed. “Lance…I like you. I’ve liked you since I first saw you walk into orientation and fall flat on your face but played it off as a pick up line. I just want to help you move past this self-doubt and see yourself the way I see you.”

“You’re just saying this. Did Shiro tell you to talk to me?” Lance shook his head. He couldn’t wrap his head around what Keith was telling him.

“No, I swear. I like you Lance.”

“I don’t know…”

Keith held his hand out in front of Lance. “Hi, I’m Keith. I used to go to the Garrison before I got kicked out and now I’m the red paladin of Voltron.” He gave Lance an encouraging smile.

He hesitantly took Keith’s hand. “I uh, I’m Lance. I was a cargo pilot at the Garrison…” Lance took a deep breath. “And now I’m the blue paladin of Voltron.”

“It’s nice to meet you Lance.” Keith’s smile grew.

“Yeah…you too.” He couldn’t bring himself to smile. He felt suffocated from the mask he constantly wore, and now that he told Keith all that, he felt no need to pretend.

Keith didn’t want to push it either. He stood up. “Make sure to eat something and get some sleep. I’ll just tell everyone that you were overwhelmed and needed some space to relax. I’ll see you later, okay?”

Lance stood up and wiped his cheek with the back of his hand. He gave Keith a soft hug. Lance felt like he had no energy left in him to even lift his arms. He leaned on Keith a little and rested his head in the crook of Keith’s neck, his arms wrapped around Keith’s shoulders. “Thank you, Keith. And just give me a little time. I just need to shake this off.”

Keith didn’t have the chance to ask Lance what he meant because as soon as the words left his mouth, Lance pulled away and walk out of the observation deck.

* * *

 

Keith just finished putting on his clothes after his shower when there was a knock on his door.

“Come in.”

The door opened and Lance took one step into Keith’s room. “Hey.”

Keith looked up and gave Lance a smile. “Hey.”

He hadn’t seen much of Lance since their moment in the observation deck. Keith knew that Lance had a lot on his plate and wanted to make sure to give him as much time as he needed to work through his problems.

Lance shuffled his feet. “Uh, do you mind if I talk to you? You don’t have to say anything. I usually go to Hunk or Coran with this sort of stuff, but they’re busy and I don’t want to pull them away from their work.”

“Yeah, I don’t mind. Sit down.” Keith sat on his bed cross legged as he began to clean his knife. Lance didn’t hesitate to take a seat.

“Okay, so, we have that big fight coming up, right?”

Keith assumed he was talking about the battle Allura briefed them on in the morning. “Yeah, what about it?”

“Is it bad to say I’m scared?” Keith glanced up at Lance. “Because I am.”

“That’s natural. It means you’re human.”

“No Keith.” Lance shifted so one of his legs was on the bed and he was facing Keith. “You don’t get it. Fighting the Galra is some scary shit, but that’s not what I’m worried about.”

“Then what is it?”

“I don’t want to die.”

Keith stopped cleaning his knife. “That’s normal too. I don’t think any of us want to die.”

Lance groaned and fell back onto the bed. “But if I die, I won’t be able to see my family again. They won’t even know I died.”

“Hey.” Keith put his knife down. “Don’t speak like that. You’ll be fine.”

“But seriously Keith. I want to see them again. The last thing I said to my brother was that he was a brat who shouldn’t have been born. The last thing I said to my sister is that her boyfriend was too good for her. My other siblings probably don’t even remember me. I want to tell my parents I love them and give my grandparents another hug. These are the thoughts I have every time we fight.”

Keith nudged his shoulder slightly. “You will see them again, okay? Even if I have to tell Allura to take us there after this.”

A small smile formed on Lance’s face. “Would you really fight her on that?”

“Yeah, I would,” Keith said confidently. He was willing to fight anyone as long as he could see Lance smiling again.

Lance sat up and grinned. “Thanks Keith.”

Keith enjoyed seeing Lance being himself. The sparkle in his eyes hadn’t fully returned, but they didn’t look lifeless anymore. Some color returned to his face. His smile didn’t seem forced anymore. Lance was getting better.

“It’s nothing.”

“There was something else…too…” Lance rubbed the back of his neck and looked down. Keith noticed a small blush spread across his face.

“What’s up?”

“So…about that thing…”

Keith was confused. “What thing?”

Lance chuckled nervously. “You kinda confessed that you like me.”

“What about it?” Keith felt better now that he had gotten that out there. He didn’t expect Lance to act on it, nor was he planning on letting it affect their new relationship.

“I’ve been doing a lot of thinking since then. Soul searching if you may. I came to a conclusion.”

“Lance you don’t need to –“

Lance held a finger to Keith’s lips. “I’m talking. And don’t ‘Lance you don’t need to’ me. I do as I please and nothing you say or do will stop me.” He removed his finger. “I want to give us a chance. And I swear this isn’t just because you told me you like me. I’ve kinda liked you for a while which is why it hurt so much to always be compared to you.” Lance found it conflicting when the guy he liked was also the guy he was always compared to, but he had been working on that since their last battle.

“Lance,” Keith said disapprovingly with a frown.

“I won’t bring that up, I promise. But what do ya say? Do you want to be my boyfriend?”

Keith always had a habit of acting before thinking and this was one of those moments. He moved his knife aside and crawled over to Lance. He place on hand on Lance’s cheek and kissed him. It was a gentle kiss that lasted for no more than a second.

As soon as Lance realized what was happening, Keith’s lips were gone. He frowned as Keith pulled away. Lance chased after Keith and let his lips crash into Keith’s. Lance may not have thought things through either as his teeth clashed with Keith’s lips. He pulled away and rubbed his mouth. Keith fell back laughing.

“What’s so funny?” Lance asked with a slight pout.

“What was that?”

“A kiss?”

Keith clutched his stomach. “Minus the lips.”

“Shut it mullet. It was because you caught me off guard and pulled away so quickly.” Lance crossed his arms and looked away from Keith.

“Have you even kissed anyone before?”

“O-of course I have!” He waited for Keith to reply to him, but the other boy was busy trying to catch his breath. “Keeeith, stop laughing at me.”

“Okay, calm down.” He looked at Lance with the huge smile still stuck on his face as he remained laying down on his bed.

Lance’s smile fell. He thought about if he would ever be able to tell his family about Keith. If he would ever have the chance to recount this story – changing it so Keith was the one who smashed his teeth into Lance and not the other way around – with his siblings and laugh over it.

Keith noticed this mood change. “C’mere.” He opened his arms and Lance laid his head down on Keith’s chest.

“I’m scared,” Lance said quietly as Keith played with his hair.

“I’ll be with you the whole time and so will everyone else. You won’t be alone.”

* * *

 

It had been a week since the briefing and since Keith and Lance started dating. Keith noticed the slow change in Lance. Lance had begun to smile again, he cracked his usual jokes, he seemed…normal. Keith kept an eye on him though, just to make sure he really was getting better.

In moments like this though, it was hard to keep an eye on Lance. “Lance, where are you?”

“I’m in the ship. I can deal with it, just get rid of the cruisers and make sure everyone on the planet is safe,” the blue paladin replied through the coms.

Keith hesitated. He knew Lance was smart and could handle this, but it didn’t stop him from worrying. “Copy.”

Keith turned the red lion around and attacked the Galra cruisers while Pidge and Hunk headed down to the planet to fight the Galra on the surface. Once Keith had finished his job, he headed over to Pidge and Hunk to help them out. The ship that Lance was on blew up, and Keith watched as the blue lion landed on the surface and Lance got out. His suit had been cracked in some places, but other than that, he seemed fine.

“Keith, your five!” he shouted at the red paladin. Keith snapped out of his daze and managed to take out the Druid last minute.

He muttered a quick thanks to Lance who was now standing with him, back to back, as they slowly became surrounded.

“What’s the plan?” Lance asked.

“Take out as many as you can and get back to your lion.” Keith took out another druid as Lance began to make a hole through their enemies. He grabbed Lance’s arm before they separated. “Lance,” he said leaning his helmet against Lance’s. “Please be careful.”

Lance smirked and shot down some more soldiers. He managed to clear a pathway to Blue, but just before he ran off to her, he turned to Keith.

“I’m going, can you make it back to Red?”

Keith grunted, not being able to take his eyes off the Galra soldier he was fighting.

Lance shot down a few soldiers around Keith to try to lighten his load. Lance took one last glance around when he noticed a Galra who had his gun aimed at the distracted paladin. Lance knew that there wasn’t enough time to get the soldier Keith was fighting away and get Keith to safety, so he took matter into his own hands. Lance moved a bit closer to the shooter and aimed his bayard at him. He only had one shot to do this so he wasn’t going to rush and mess up. Keith’s life depended on it.

He let out a breath as he lined up his bayard with the shooter. Right before the shooter had the chance to take out Keith, Lance shot him. It was clean, precise, and made Lance proud.

Lance checked Keith to make sure he was okay. “Keith, how are you –“

A burning sensation rippled through Lance’s chest, causing his body to jerk forward. His bayard fell through his fingers as his feel to his knees. Everything began to move slowly and in a blur. Keith’s express was a mix of horror and fear as he made his way to Lance.

The burning sensation in Lance’s chest grew quickly and it dulled all his other sensations. The only thing he could think about was the how his body felt like it was on fire. He hunched over, but the only blood visible was the blood he began to cough up. The force of his coughs caused Lance to fall onto his side. His strength was failing him. He couldn’t get back up.

Keith collapsed next to him. “L…nce.”

He moved his head slowly, the world spinning.

Keith held Lance’s face. He was crying. He reached up, pushing passed the pain, to wipe away Keith’s tears.

“You…ed…with me.” Keith began to call the other paladins for backup, but Lance knew it was no use. He knew there wouldn’t be enough time.

The thought rocked him to his core. He was dying and there was no way to save him. This was his biggest fear. “I’m scared…” he croaked quietly.

“No. We…ill get…to a pod.” Keith placed Lance’s head in his lap and ran his fingers through his hair. Lance closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling. It slowly disappeared as the pain in Lance’s chest did. It was the first thing to go and Lance knew he needed to say everything right now.

“Could you…do me a favor?” Talking brought a dull resurgence of the burning sensation early to his throat. Lance couldn’t hear Keith’s reply but saw him mouth yes. “When you get back to Earth…tell my family I love them…and I miss them.”

The initial shock of the blow had faded and the ringing in his ears had stopped. Lance could hear again. “You can say it yourself when we take you back home. I’ll have Allura take us back right after you get better. So please, just hang in a little longer.” Keith was looking up, searching for something or someone. His tears kept falling but his voice had a certain resolve to it.

“And can you tell everyone else that it was a pleasure working with them?”

“Lance –“

He began coughing again, more blood running down his cheek and chin. “Keith…I wish you told me you liked me sooner. I would have gotten to spend more time loving you a-and not hating you.” He couldn’t see anything anymore. The world went black. He tried to raise his arm to hold Keith’s hand, but his body wouldn’t listen to him. He knew his heart had stopped beating. He couldn’t tell if Keith hand moved away or was holding his body. He didn’t know if the others had found his dead body yet. He was swimming in darkness with only one means keeping his connected to the living.

They say the last thing to go is hearing, and Lance could attest to that. Everything sounded far away and Lance was too tired to try to focus on the voices he heard. He heard as Keith called out for him. He heard as Keith got up and ran away. He heard Shiro shouting at Keith to stop beating up a dead man who Lance assumed was the Galra who shot him. He heard Keith’s protests as Hunk and Shiro ripped him away from the lifeless body.

 

But then…Lance felt a slight, cool breeze. He opened his eyes and saw he was sitting on the beach with his family. Everything was a bit hazy, almost like a memory. Was it all a dream? He touched the sand underneath him, he felt the warm rays of the sun. He wasn’t sure what it was, but he was happy.

He saw his parents sitting next to him and his siblings playing in the water. This was home – he was home again.

He turned to his parents who couldn’t see him. It was alright with Lance though. He would be able to do what he had wanted for a long time. He placed his hand on top of his mom’s and smiled at her. “I love you guys.”

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think!


End file.
